How Limiting Beliefs Are Holding You Back

Show Notes

Background

How are you stopping yourself? We are all our own worst enemies. We’re the ones that quite often go, “Nah, I can’t do that.” Or “I shouldn’t do that.”

Grab The Opportunity

Should we jump onto this opportunity or not? I was on an opportunity this morning that I hadn’t read much about. I just saw the time worked for me and thought, yep, I’ll do that. When I got there, I realised it was actually a selling platform and I had to have something to sell. So I scrambled around quickly, thinking, what am I going to do? I could offer a one-on-one coaching session, or I’ve got my book, The Coaches Marketing Roadmap.

Of course, I went with The Coaches Marketing Roadmap, and I was able to put it together quickly enough in the time they moved through the other people, and I sold two books. Now, two books might not sound like a lot, but that was an opportunity I made out of nothing.

Now, if my limiting beliefs had kicked in, thinking, “I didn’t know it was a selling event, I don’t have anything prepared,” I wouldn’t have done it. And quite often, we stop ourselves. I did have that little voice in the back of my head saying, “Maybe I’ll just slip out of here quietly. Maybe I won’t bother with this one and say the internet was unstable or something.”

But one of my values is integrity and honesty. I had committed to go, so I knew I had to be there, even though I didn’t really know what it was about. And I did it.

You Don’t Need to be Perfect

So, what are your limiting beliefs? What are the assumptions or little voices in your head that are preventing you from doing your best work, from getting on stage, or from taking that opportunity you weren’t quite sure about? What is it in your head? Because most people aren’t going to worry about it. You might get a few grammar critics saying, “Oh, it should have been ‘coaches’ instead of ‘coach’,” but that’s okay because they’re only trying to help you, trying to make your work better. And if you don’t feel like it should be changed, then don’t.

Stop Self Sabotage

You’re going to attract the people you’re going to attract. If someone’s looking for perfect speech, perfect grammar, and every word spelt correctly, they’re not going to be my type of people, because I make mistakes, and my work is good enough.

For me, getting my work out into the world, for you to hear it, see it, and interact with it, is far better than it being absolutely perfect. Did I get a hair out of place here? Maybe. Did I get my French wrong? Yep. These things happen, but you’ve got to have the confidence to get out there and go, “I’m just going to put my best foot forward.” And you’re not going to be able to change it, adapt it, and make it better until you do.

Are you self-sabotaging? Are you stopping yourself because somebody said your grammar wasn’t correct? Somebody didn’t like your messaging? And who is that somebody? Is it lots of somebodies, or is it just one person who isn’t even your audience?

Your people, if you’re talking to your audience, defining that person, helping that person, they’re going to love you. And the other people, well, some of them might say, “She’s interesting, I’ll go with that,” and others will say, “No, not for me.” And that’s actually a beautiful thing, because you don’t want to be spending your time and effort trying to engage with people who have no interest in you.

They’re never going to be interested in you. They’re either too far along or too far back, whatever that might be. Yes, sometimes people aren’t right for now, and you can nurture them, but other times, no matter what you do, they’re never going to be your people. So just let them go. Case and release, that’s the way to go.

So, stop self-sabotaging. You are in the perfect place right now for what you need to be. You are you, and you do it your way. And it doesn’t matter if, on a call of 40, there are six other people doing the same thing as you. They don’t do it your way.

Believe in Yourself

I started my business, my original business, which is still going today, my marketing agency, when I had a baby. Did I think I could do it? Absolutely not. Didn’t really have much of a clue what it was all about. But I was fortunate enough that my mother was a bookkeeper, so she set up some basic processes for me.

I did what I needed to do, took it one step at a time. Did I have self-sabotaging thoughts? Absolutely. Was I low in confidence sometimes? Sure. I went to a business networking group, and one of the gentlemen there suggested that I should enter the business awards.

Great, I thought, in the home business category. Now, this was a long time before Covid, so having a home business back then meant you were small, a hobbyist. One good thing that came out of Covid is that working from home is now normal. But this gentleman looked down his nose at me and said, “That would be a good category for you.”

Later, I went to him for advice on something else – probably not a great idea considering what he said – and I wanted to bring my husband into the business. He said, “You’ll never be big enough for that.” Then he looked at my books and said, “Actually, you are.”

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Cathy Smith Coaching